Shockingly, 28,625 of you visited 74,243 different pages on orangecountyconcepts.com during the month of November. That is down significantly from our glory days, but still a mystery to me considering we haven’t updated since Familiar Joe’s post about the Electric Zoo festival in September. At least our last post was in September, MiamiNights.com hasn’t had a post since June, and DrinkUpOrlando.com and Defame Orlando are like, non-exhistant now, hmmm how things change. So where are you getting your gossipy news now Orlando nightlife people? How are you surviving without our witty, insulting, sarcasm?

 

So you may ask yourself, what is going on with Docta Dawe, dLux, E. Sprad the photographer, Matt Phillips, Chris Callahan the photographer, and the rest of the bloggers that faithfully brought the city of Orlando entertainment for over a year here on OCC. Well, we are at a crossroads… That is:

 

Revive OCC?

Move on to a new project?

 

Its been a tough call. As many of you know I have been sidelined for a few months with a medical thing, (See http://www.orangecountyconcepts.com/2009/03/29/docta-dawe-public-service-announcement-2/) and will be returning to the DJ world around January. Until then I plan on doing a lot of nothing and really would like to get back to blogging. Soooo with that being said I will be announcing how I plan to do that over the next few days…

 

Personally, I would like to create a new blog, one that is not over run with comments from Russians about where to score viagra on the low low. I also would love to do something with my past collaborators… (even Kaypee), we did have a lot of fun here on OCC, and I think that really came across through our blogs. Anyways, hopefully this little thought from my head will catch on to the revival, or to a new project…. either way, my person/temporary blog will be up and running soon, but will mostly focus on my cancer treatment. So lets get this party started again my Orlando blogger friends!!

 

I can always be reached at:

BrianDawe@orangecountyconcepts.com

or facebook.com/DJDoctaDawe

For those who missed out, The 21 Convention ran through it’s third successful year this past July for an unprecedented 4 days.Over 100 people, and 21 of the world’s finest teachers of success in dating, relationships, exercise, nutrition, and more- all right here in downtown Orlando @ The Crowne Plaza. The event was filmed by Creative Cinema of Orlando Florida in true 720p HD and will be released free to the world September 8th on the homepage- The21Convention.com. There is no e-mail collection, no ads, and no cost- it’s simply free to stream in true HD.Photos were taken by Contiga Broadcasting and most (more as each day passes) can be viewed here.For those of you who did attend, thanks! I hope to see everyone out again in 2010.-Anthony “Dream” JohnsonDirector of The 21 Convention

A brief recap:

February 2009, the Student Workers Club of Boulder High (Boulder, CO), petition the county school board to change the name of the school from “Boulder High” to “Barack Obama High”.   The school’s SWC president says

“the 200th anniversary of Abraham Lincoln’s birth to commemorate both the role he had in making the election of Barack Obama possible and the social progress that has been made since he issued the emancipation proclamation.”

Boulder High principal Bud Jenkins retorted with an ever-supportive:

“With all due respect to the president,” the principal added, “of all the things in the world that need to be changed, Boulder High School’s name is probably way down the list.

This campaign came almost on the heels of Long Island’s Ludlum Elementary changing their name to, clevery put, “Barack Obama Elementary School”.  That’s right.  “The students wrote mock debates and watched the polls and were excited to do something they could feel pride in”, a parent said.  On another note, the schools population is 62% Hispanic and 36% black African-American.  I believe the remaining 2% of the students child prodigies must be somewhat divided between these three socio-economic groups:

Recently, the Young Conservatives of Texas spoke out against a bill which would rename a portion of Interstate 20 in honor of Obama.One of the YCT’s Directors had this to say about the bill:

“Finally, naming memorials for sitting politicians is not consistent with American traditions. We believe it represents the dangerous trend of Americans blindly worshiping politicians rather than diligently holding them accountable to the best interests of the nation.”

The above-quoted Mr. Ed Oden (if that is your real name), also a champion of the obvious, offered this interesting musing:

“Soviet Russia erected hundreds of statutes of Stalin while he ruled. In Saddam Hussein’s Iraq, one would drive down the Saddam Hussein Expressway to the Saddam Hussein Airport… You don’t find this in America.”

Hmm. Very poignant indeed.  I’ll have to keep abreast of that situation.

Fast forward… circa summer 2009, Orlando.

Well, while we didn’t build a statue, Orlandoans now have something else to bitch about.

We the people, of the City Beautiful, now have our own piece of history.   Congrats!

Apparently this has been official since late May, but no one I know has seen this, and the sign looks as if it was just built last week.   Moving on…

It was a unanimous vote, partly spearheaded by Orlando’s favorite racist hypocrite beeyatch, Commissioner Daisy Lynum. [For those of you who don’t know her career has been a little scuffed when it comes to the subject of racial lines, as you can read here and here.]

Anyway, I briefly heard about this a month ago, but nobody knew exactly where it was.  A quick Google Maps search on my iPhone (apparently the B.O. Parkway is in the MMS messaging update?) yielded no such luck:

 

Hmm.. Not quite what i expected.

 

No fear, just head down Conroy road to the “old” intersection of Conroy Road and Mission Road.  And you will be greeted by this:

 

 

All 800 or so feet of it.   Ahh, what a fitting honor.  A street driveway with nothing on it.

 

“Yet”, says the City of Orlando.  They plan to expand on it.

 

 Although anyone that’s driven on the 408/417/528/E. 50/Turnpike/W. 50/Church Street/Downtown/I-4/pretty much any street that’s not in Windermere, knows that that statement is bullshit bullshit (let’s be honest.)  And by the time that B.O. Parkway is “filled out”, America will be caught up in a maelstrom of some other razzle-dazzle politician, and we will be chomping at the veritable teat and/or teabag of whoever the next great worthless hopeless politician with enough panache to send us to the polls in record numbers, blindly just voting at the next great white biracial Muslim philandering draft-dodging smoke-but-not-inhaling eskimo female (just not Palin, please) hype.

 

Happy driving Orlando!  Oh, and click it or ticket!  That 0.2mi stretch of road is dangerous. Until we can get one of these up… take it easy out there.

 

 

 

 

So just about everyone in the UCF/Orlando area read and/or commented on my blog about how lame promoting around this town has become here and here, so this blog will be somewhat of a sequel to that, in a sense.

I’m swag surfing FaceBook today and I see a status update from none other than Clint “Mr.Orlando” House that goes a little something like this…

Gasp.

 You read right folks, Mr. Orlando is officially hanging up his blazers (or should I say blazer) and throwing in the towel on the city that coined his now infamous nickname. Can you blame him? I definetly cannot. One thing I can say is that Clint gave it his best shot. Let’s re-cap, in picture form.

 Clint popped up in the nightlife scene by promoting for WhatsHot with Chris Nault and Rob Hype…

 

(Nault has lost some weight since then, eh? He and Mikey Stylez must be on the same diet because they are both looking way buff these days, no homo. Dawe, you could take some advice from those two.)

Clint left WhatsHot due to financial issues within the company (gasp again) and decided, because he has 2,000+ FaceBook friends, that he should start his own company and thus Revolution Nights was born.

 

I guess no one had the balls to tell Clint that there was a gay club with the same name but whatever. If that wasn’t enough to scratch your head about, he then made a logo to get people to join his ‘revolution’ which looks like someone from South Carolina might have made to make a statement about OTHER things.

 

Wow.

 And so the revolution began. Now, Clint might not have started a revolution in nightlife but he sure did make a revolution in graphic design.

 

Can we get the number to your graphic designer? Please? I mean, how does he know how to do all those cool tricks on MS Paint?

Ok, Revolution Nights was a bust, so Clint decided to re-brand himself and his company by going back to the moniker that he had while working for Biggins, Mr. Orlando.

Clint then secured himself a night at Antiqua, Project Bikini.

 

Obviously hired a different graphic artist this time cause this one isn’t too bad. It isn’t too good either, because they forgot to put one instrumental thing on the flyer, the date. Being the professional Mr. Orlando is, he pulled out his handy silver colored Sharpie and added the date in himself.

Clint went all in on this party, posting status updates about it once every 30 mins. He even found time to post status updates while swooning the ladies…

Project Bikini was apart of the 4th of July weekend extravaganza Mr. Orlando promised us. Wednesday at Antiqua, Friday at Bliss (also a bikini party) and concluding it all Saturday with the biggest joke of a 4th of July party in Orlando history, the “I’m on a Boat” party, which was cancelled last minute due to nobody giving a shit or willing to pay the ridiculous ticket price.

Mr. Orlando obviously failed to do his homework because…

1. Chillers owns Church Street on Wednesday nights and has for years now.

2. OCC did a bikini party mere weeks before at Antiqua, which would end up being the death of STEREO because it was THAT bad.

So after 3 failed attempts at starting new nights around town (Fusian, Antiqua, and let’s not forget Medicis) he did what no one was expecting and joined forces with Mikey Stylez to help him launch his newest night at Roxy, Models and Bottles. After the first week success of Stylez’ new party, Clint then made himself an official KnightLyfer. Why? Who the fuck knows.

Here he is pictured with DJ19Sixty and his freshly shaven arms…

 

According to Mikey Stylez, Clint pulled $500 that night, which Dawe and I both think is too saucy to be true but if you did Clint, good job. Don’t spend all that money on Bud Light and Marlboro Lights.

One thing Clint did do which I thought was both slick and pathetic at the same time was make a FaceBook group while the Orlando Magic were in the playoffs titled ‘Magic are going to the finals!!’ or something along those lines. In this group, he amassed 1,000+ people. Well, as you know, the Magic didn’t make it past Phil Jackson and his 9 rings, so Clint did what any sleezy promoter would do. He changed the name of his group to ‘I party with Mr. Orlando!’.

Bravo. Rather than make a new group, you just changed the name of the one you made about sports and turned it into a group about partying. Anyway, so after Mikey Stylez made it rain on Clint (no homo) because of that $500 first night at Roxy, Clint then changed the name of the group AGAIN, this time to ‘KnightLyfe.com’. Incredible. Absolutely incredible, Clint.

That brings us to today, where we are left to ask ourselves, what happened? Was the money not good enough? Did they take your microphone from you at the club for laughing into it too much and that rubbed you the wrong way? Did someone steal your bottle of Verdi out of VIP that Stylez gave to you for a job well done? We need answers; the public deserves to know.

 Or was it just for reasons that I explained in the blog that started all this?

 

 

 

Disclaimer: This blog was not meant to be an “I hate Clint House” blog, but merely a busting of the chops. Clint is my friend and knows this should be taken with the smallest grain of salt out of the shaker (as should anything I said about anyone else IE: Stylez, Nault and 19sixty). In the end, you obviously made some type of impression on people if I decided to take time out to write this detailed blog about you. Congrats Clint, you finally got your own blog on OCC.

This blog has been Docta Douche Chris approved:

 

 

 

Chris wanted to let all the ladies know he got a haircut today.

 DJ dLux is not going to be a happy camper that I wrote this blog, since it will knock down his blog post about his latest mixtape “Zone Defense”. If you haven’t downloaded the hottest mixtape of the summer so far get on this now! This is not just a regional mixtape, dLux is doing it really big right now with almost 2,500 downloads in a little over a day! At that rate he is as on track to be neck and neck with Bow Wow’s first week record sales from last month. Not to shabby.

 

Orlando is pretty lame right now. There is nothing in the club industry I can bash at the moment unfortunately, and hasn’t been for a while. I predict it will be a very slowwwww summer for the Orlando nightlife industry. About the only thing this city has going for it right now is our beloved Orlando Magic.

 

Scott Skiles must be very proud.

 

I know this isn’t a sports blog, but bare with me, I’ll find a way to tie this into the blog somehow. After years of shitty attendance and disappointment, mostly with the decisions the front office made nearly 10 years ago, the Magic is back in Orlando. I have to admit, although I am a fan, I was pretty skeptical that they would pull this series off against the Cavs , and its not over yet, even thought it would be pretty hard to blow a 3-1 series lead. It is nearly impossible to have a conversation about the Orlando Magic with another Orlando local without bringing up the past, which was an extreme failure. In 1995 the Orlando Magic were SWEPT in the NBA finals by the Houston Rockets, a series remembered mostly for its game one disappointment, which caused a spiral of falure. With the Magic up by three points late in the game, Nick Anderson, typically a 70% free throw shooter, missed four consecutive free throws that could have sealed the victory for Orlando. I remember watching Marv Albert now, giving play-by-play in Houston for game 4, and seeing the Houston fans waving brooms in the air to symbolize the “Sweep”. We all know the rest of the story: Swept by Michael Jordan and the bulls in the Eastern Conference Finals the following year, Shaq signing with the Lakers, Penny causing a mutiny against Brian Hill, and tons of epic FAILURE since.

 

The Glory Days (when our uniforms didn’t look as fucking stupid as those v-necks)

 

The real purpose of this little NBA talk was to inform all the people of Orlando of the unbelievable opportunity we may have as fans. Not only the possibility of having NBA finals basketball in Orlando, but the possibility of a Victory, and NBA Championship. Now here’s the fun part…

 

I have been watching the NBA finals every year since 1993. Whenever the home team wins the championship, there is usually a celebration, some big, some not as big, it really seems to depend on the spirit and rambunctiousness of the city. Since the days of the Bulls dynasty, the celebrations just haven’t been the same. Last year when the Celtics won, their on court celebration was kind of week, so the fans attempted to take it to the streets. Unfortunately the police presence was high. “As a working class kid, I feel there is no better way of commemorating my hometown’s victory than destroying my hometown,” said Doug Coswell, an unemployed 28-year-old Celtics superfan after last years NBA Finals victory. “I really wanted to fuck some shit up tonight - but before I knew it, some pig cracked me on the head and I woke up in Suffolk County Jail.” Nice attempt Doug!

 

So you might be asking yourself, “Mr. Dawe, are you suggesting we cause a riot and destroy Downtown Orlando if the Magic win the NBA title?”. Not quite. I mean, if the opportunity presents itself go for it, but the chances of that happening are pretty slim with the extreme police presence that should be surrounding the city. On the other hand, with the Arena right next door to Parramore there shouldn’t be much to fuck up anyways.

 

We are getting a little ahead of ourselves here, I mean the Magic aren’t even in the NBA Finals yet. If they do make it, there is definitely no guarantee that they will win with either Denver or LA waiting. If they do pull it off and win the big prize who knows if they will do it at home. All I am saying is if the Magic win the NBA championship at home, it is essential as a city, for the fans to STORM THE COURT. Orlando is known as a city of PUSSIES. Everyone loves disney and all the family friendly tourist attractions here, but is that what us locals want to be remembered by? This is ORLANDO’S CHANCE TO BE BAD ASS MOTHER FUCKERS. Of course there will be 15-20 police officers surrounding the parameter of the court, but what good will that do when a crowd of 18,000 people go insane? This is your moment Orlando. The chance to break free from being a weak ass tourist destination with mouse ears as its mascot. If the Magic win the NBA championship this year, we must take back our city, in front of a NATIONAL TV AUDIENCE and act like a bunch of FUCKING IDIOTS.

 

Here is the playbook: 

Boston Celtics 1984 NBA Finals Victory.

 

 

Boston’s fans did it right at Boston Garden this night in 1984! Watch the place go insane at 2:22 into the below video. The players had to tell the fans to get off the court before the game was even over! Even better, 3:23, wow. I don’t even know what to say to that one, but I want to be that guy if the Magic win the championship, daisy dukes and all. SO REMEMBER if the Magic make it to the NBA finals, and if they win it at home,  help spread the word, MAGIC MASSACRE: STORM THE COURT!

 

I figured if I wanted to write this nonsense I better do it quickly before dLux and Draven drop their mixtapes this week, as I know they will want the top blog spot on the website. I know this may be a little off topic, actually, it kind of pertains to nightlife news, because there is a very high probability that I will be looking like a douchebag as I frolic from club to club.

 

I have always wanted to grow a beard. I made a half ass attempt at it toward the end of my Firestone days, but then I woke up early one day and shaved it off. It was getting itchy and annoying, and in a half asleep morning daze I shaved it off, forgetting that I was actually trying to grow a beard. Well if I have it my way, this summer the beard will return. Here is the ultimate goal:

 

 Tommie Sunshine, beard genius.

 

Ok, maybe not the long hair. Do ladies find any sort of sexual appeal in a beard? So far I have gotten mixed reviews, but I am willing to give it a shot. If anything I just want to have some facebook pictures looking like the one above, or even better this:

 

 Joaquin Phoenix, beardo.

According to some online forums I have read, “Beards are very “in” right now.”, and everyone knows how important it is for me to be “in” (see Defame: Orlando’s scene confusion blog). Nothing screams emotional stability like a neck beard, not to mention some men are recognized nearly as much for their beards as they are their accomplishments (Lincoln, ZZ Top, Rick Rubin). Now the real question here is if I grow this Joaquin Phoenix-esq beard, will I have to sport those stylish sunglasses and the skinny neck tie as well? I mean, look at how well this beardo has worked for this man:

  I am officially sold. Ok, so now the hard part. Which style beard shall I choose?

 

1. “The Gordon Fisherman”

 All out, uncontrolled pile of hair. Sported by Hemingway, Grizzly Adams, Paul Gasol, Gilbert, and most homeless guys.

 

 

2. “The Timberlake”

 A closely groomed, sexy look. Sported by Justin Timberlake, George Clooney, Jake Gyllenhaal.

 

 

3. “The Original ’stache”

 Most don’t believe this should be allowed to be sported at all, anywhere, unless the person has lost a bet. Exceptions include Fred Goldman, Tom Selleck, Freddie Mercury, and most importantly Geraldo Rivera.

 

4. “The Trucker”

 A personal favorite, a Play-Off beard gone wrong, only for Badass Mofo’s. Inspired by James Hetfield and Hulk Hogan.

 

I am leaning toward “The Gordon Fisherman”, what do you think?

With all this beard excitement I almost forgot, it is that time again…

BEST OF ORLANDO voting from the Orlando Weekly.

Allow me to make some suggestions:

Best local Internet site: orangecountyconcepts.com

 Best local blog: orangecountyconcepts.com

 Best club DJ: DJ Docta Dawe (Can we please get a #1 this year? After all, I did DJ the “Best of Orlando” party last year!)

 Best club night: STEREO @ Antigua

 Best hip-hop act: DJ dLux (I know he’s not an “act” but since there is no “Best Mixtape DJ” section I shall protest with this vote)

 Best T-shirts: Reign Clothing

 Best coffeehouse: Austin’s Coffee (austinscoffee.com)

 Best local radio personality: Shannon Burke (You gotta love him! Maybe this will get him his job back!)

Remember, YOU HAVE TO VOTE IN AT LEAST 15 CATEGORIES, so please fill in the other answers as best as you can. It will only take a second, and if we win, we promise to retire the term “nice dick”. Thanks.

 

Imagine the look on the face of any random 50 year old investment banker driving home from his downtown Orlando office, when all of a sudden he sees 200+ people with blood all over them, lurching around the city beautiful.

 

Enter Zombie March Orlando 2009.

(OCC’s own Matt Philip’s participating in last years march)

 

Orlando Zombie March was started in 2006 by Orlando’s Rocky Horror Cast - The Rich Weirdoes. This has been an annual event they have put on for the past 3 years. They are inviting all to be apart of this years “Zombie March”. The March is TODAY, so get that makeup ready, FYI: Justin James has plenty of makeup at his house if anyone needs to borrow some. According to the facebook invite:

 

“If you want to be a zombie, grab an old Halloween costume, Old work uniform, or old clothes and dirty/bloody them however you want. Makeup need not be elaborate(unless you want to) We’d like to see all kinds of Zombies this year- Zombies, Ghouls, Vampires(or Vampire Zombies), Postal Workers, Theme Park Employees, Corporate Zombies, Plague Victims(swine flu please…scary stuff),Furry Zombies(You know who you are), Dead Celebrities, Dead Rockers, Etc.

 

1st MARCH: 4pm: Meet on Park Ave. Near Rollins College. (7-11) We’ll march down past the stores and shoppers till we reach the gazebo in the park. Then back to the 7-11.

 

2nd MARCH: 6pm: Meet at Gazebo on Lake Eola (opposite side with theater) We’ll march around the lake, into Downtown Orlando, Up Orange, and then back to the lake.

 

In years past we’ve seen more victims on the first March but had more zombies on the 2nd. Feel free to do one or both, but know that the Marches are unique in their own way. Which is why we keep doing both.”

 

BRAINS! BRAINS! BRAINS!

 

Zombie Nation  -  Kernkraft 400 (Laidback Luke 2009 Remix) (yousendit link)

 

 

A very reliable source has informed me that MetroWest’s newest nightclub, Roll Bar, has shut its doors indefinetly. Rumors are that the club wasn’t paying its bills and had to fold due to overwhelming debt.

 

Roll Bar recently fired their GM to bring in another person to hopefully breathe new life into their club which, in my opinion wasn’t that bad of a spot. They had the right idea, the right location, and it seemed like they had a steady following but I guess it just wasn’t enough to compete. Investors have apparently gutted the building taking everything they can. Televisions, VIP furniture, and of course plenty of booze were all seized by investors. Rumor has it that the owners of the highly successful Tavern On The Lake, which is also in the same plaza as Roll Bar, are trying to buy the now defunct club.

 

We’ll have more on this story as it develops so be sure to check back and REMEMBER WHERE YOU HEARD IT FIRST, ORANGE. COUNTY. CONCEPTS.

 Ok so first things first, DEFAME: Orlando is apparently not Homer Simpson.

Who would have thought, right?

The writer of the now infamous Orlando blog has to decided to call it quits after just over a year. Who can forget the Kanye Shutter Glasses post? How about Orange County Concepts first time making it?

You cannot even mention the blog without saying two words: Saturday/Thursday. The blog provided the platform for no matter what the topic of the post was, for people to express how they felt about longtime Saturday/Thursday DJ Pauly Crush not running the highly successful weekly anymore, most with complete and utter discontent.

What I found so funny and intriguing about the blog is what once was so embarrassing about getting ‘defamed’ turned into what seemed to be a promotional giant whether good or bad. Some people couldn’t look at it as open minded and would have their posts taken down justin james.

If you followed the saga you would know that DJ Docta Dawe himself at the height of the blogs popularity dropped a bombshell on the downtown nightlife scene by not only revealing the identity of the blogger, but backing it up with proof of IP addresses matching up among other things on OCC.

Tempers flaired, in what was to become the most commented blog in OCC history. People saying that we have revealed the wrong person, or that there are multiple people who write for the blog so we would never really know the true identity of the person/persons. What people don’t know is that Meghan actually contacted Dawe through the Defame MySpace and asked him to take that blog down but Dawe said he would only do it under the condition that they finally reveal themselves and not over MySpace or IM, but over the phone. Dawes phone rings and what does he hear? “It’s Megan, I’m Defame”. So Dawe re-worded the blog to not spoil the fun that she was having and keep the mystery alive.

In due time this little blog talking and trashing about all things nightlife in Downtown Orlando would become voted the #1 blog by the Orlando Weekly (OCC got #3) and would eventually end up getting a cover story in the Weekly as well.

After “re-editing” the post revealing her, Dawe and Meghan would actually became good friends and I myself also had the pleasure of meeting and hanging out with the illutrious writer of the blog that captivated a town for months (although her friends are a different, bitchy story).

So in conclusion we here at OCC would like to thank and congratulate Meghan for a job well done. No matter how many of our nights you bashed, put car-bed-Dawe-face on pictures, we always took it in stride and never personal and knew that if people were talking about us, we were obviously doing something right.